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Welcome to the October, 2003 issue of the Inner Brat Newsletter. Welcome, new readers. If you enjoy this newsletter, please forward it to your friends and encourage them to subscribe. All they need to do is to send a blank email message to innerbrat-subscribe@topica.com.
If you have comments or questions, feel free to email me at .
IN THIS ISSUE
> Professional athletes behaving badly
> Inner brats in the news
> How have you tamed your own inner brat?
> Inner brat tip of the month: Stressed out by commuter traffic?
> Distribution information
This newsletter is hosted by Topica.com. Topica may include advertisements for unrelated products. I have no control over these ads, but they do help pay for the expenses of distribution, which keeps the newsletter free of cost to you.
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Professional Athletes Behaving Badly
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Assault. Rape. Head injuries. Drug abuse. DUI. These words have appeared in newspaper headlines for decades -- but NOT in the sports pages, until recently. Nowadays stories of athletes behaving badly are regular fare in the sports news.
Just in the past week we have seen two brawls in a single Yankees/Red Sox game, which resulted in injuries and fines. Basketball player Kobe Bryant is facing accusations of rape. Tampa Bay football player Warren Sapp was fined $50,000 for shoving and using abusive language to officials. New York Jets football player John Abraham was benched after being arrested for driving while intoxicated. USC basketball player Rolando Howell pleaded no context to a charge of criminal domestic violence.
Such stories are now so common, that we are no longer surprised by them. In fact, according to the Institute for Diversity and Ethics in Sports, around 100 athletes per year -- that's two per week -- are accused of rape or other violence toward women. Research has shown that athletes also have a high incidence of risky behavior: drug abuse, reckless driving, gambling and promiscuity. These behaviors tend to result in trouble with the law.
It's ironic that so many champions, who made it to the top through determination, focus and discipline, could display such poor judgment off the playing field.
Many people blame the "system" which pays athletes exorbitant salaries and provides instant celebrity and privilege. The young men become spoiled and quickly learn to feel entitled to get what they want when they want it. Critics of the system also point out that wealthy athletes can afford expensive defense attorneys who manipulate the courts to dismiss charges or reduce penalties against them. And the fans are very forgiving, willing to overlook "mistakes" made by their sports idols.
To some extent all of this is true. Situations and environment do influence behavior. But that's not the whole story when it comes to athletes behaving like brats.
We know from research studies that professional athletes have certain personality characteristics that undoubtedly enhance their game, but at the same time make them more likely to get into trouble.
First, athletes are more aggressive and competitive than most people. That's a given - how else would they rise to the top? People who are aggressive and competitive don't back down from a challenge - whether it's in the face of the opponent on the playing field, or in response to the word "no" in the bedroom.
A second characteristic of professional athletes is their confidence. Confidence gives one a feeling of control and optimism, which is essential during a close game. Confident people focus on the positive and minimize the negative. While this is very useful on the court or on the field, it does not always work in the real world.
An inflated sense of confidence is one of the factors that leads athletes to take more risk than the average person. Risk is an inherent component of success, especially calculated risk. You would think that if athletes applied these risk-calculating skills to their lives as well as they did to their game, they wouldn't be so prone to alcohol and drug abuse, reckless driving, gambling and promiscuity.
But here's where the inner brat comes in. The athletes who get into trouble probably do some calculating of risk, but their calculations are way off. Their inner brats minimize the consequence of risky behavior, in order to justify it. Thus, when an opportunity comes up, they convince themselves that nothing bad is going to happen and nobody's going to get hurt.
Add to this mix athletes' need for stimulation. Most of these guys thrive on action, quick-changing situations, and uncertainty. This is what gives them the edge until the very last second of the game. But when the game is over, such personality traits aren't turned off. The athletes continue to seek excitement.
The need for stimulation, combined with miscalculating risk, is what compromises the judgment of people who drive recklessly, use drugs, get into physical fights, engage in adultery and commit acts of violence. To that extent, sports heroes are just as vulnerable to their inner brats as are the rest of us.
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In my book, "Taming Your Inner Brat: A Guide to Transforming Self-defeating Behavior," you can read more about how culture and personality traits affect your inner brat.
There are 4 ways to buy this book:
~Visit your local bookstore
~Order online from my web site, http://www.innerbrat.com
~click here to go to Amazon.com: http://shorterlink.com/?I5P5U1
-You can also order by telephone directly from the publisher (503) 531-8700. Ask for the "Friends and family" rate to receive a discount.
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Inner Brats in the News
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Two brawls during a championship baseball game ended up in injuries and fines. In the first fight, the Boston Red Sox pitcher threw the Yankee's 72-year-old bench coach to the ground, surrounded by players from both teams. There were accusations on both sides that the pitchers had been aiming for the batters' heads. The second fight broke out when an employee of the Red Sox, who was assigned to the New York Yankees' bullpen, started loudly cheering for his own team. Yankees team members attacked him.
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Last July a man who went on a shooting spree at work, killing 3 people, wounding 5 others and then killed himself. Now his mother has filed a workers' compensation death- benefit claim from the company because he was injured and died on company time. She had been financially dependent on her son, and said, "I don't feel I should have to pay for the actions that he chose to do."
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A 41-year-old college professor was charged with sexual assault and first-degree false imprisonment after sexually molesting a student. He claimed that he had lost his mind for a few seconds and blamed the student because of how she was dressed.
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For more stories about brats in the news visit my website
http://www.drwallin.com/news.shtml
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How have you tamed your own inner brat?
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Read stories of people who are working on taming their inner brats. Contribute your own story. You can remain anonymous. Go to: http://www.drwallin.com/innerbrat_contrib.shtml
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Inner brat tip of the month: STRESSED OUT BY COMMUTER TRAFFIC?
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Driving to and from work during rush hour can be stressful and draining. You can't change what other drivers do, but you can change how you think about the situation. Try these tips and arrive relaxed, not frustrated.
1. Leave a few minutes earlier. Even 5 minutes is an investment that will reduce stress during the commute. It gives you a mental "cushion" of time.
2. Adjust your expectations. There's supposed to be lots of traffic at this time. Accept the fact that travel will take longer than at less busy times.
3. Don't allow your inner brat to grumble about traffic. This will only make you more frustrated. Instead, distract yourself from the inner brat's grumbling by listening to the radio, turning on music, or talking with your passengers.
4. Put the problem into perspective. People in some parts of the world would love to complain that their worst problem of the day is a traffic jam.
5. Remind yourself that heavy traffic is a very temporary problem. Even if your inner brat whines that it "can't stand it," YOU can stand it.
Until next month,
Pauline Wallin, Ph.D.
http://www.innerbrat.com
